My friend is gone.  Leukemia.
She died today. 2:35 pm.
Facebook tells me so.

Three daughters. A third grader, kindergartner, and baby sister.

When Robb died, Allie sent love and gift cards and meals and coloring pages from her little girls – and very sweetly, mittens. Two lefts, which made them hard for little boys to wear, and I kept them anyway.

It is beautifuly strange, strangely beautiful, to have read her words yesterday and to know she is with Robb today.

I almost wrote to her earlier this week, sensing her time was near, to ask her to carry my words to him. A messenger from here to there. But I didn’t, because I didn’t want to hurt her family who would likely read the words before she could. How dare I be so insensitive to think of myself and my heart when theirs break and bleed.

I’m sure he has greeted her now. Cheered her to her finish line, I know it in my heart. He loved Allie. When we were starting our families, Robb and I said she carried pregnancy better than most women we knew, certainly more discreetly than his very own wife.

She was a beauty, that Allison.

Adam, strong man, her love and her champion,
my heart aches for you.

We prayed for healing. God, forgive us; I don’t think we understand what it is. I learn to pray for the courage and strength of those who are left behind, yet unhealed.

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Allie and Adam

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